Grief, loss of something that is part of our identity.
We have probably all lost some ‘thing’ that has challenged our being, sense of worth or identity.
Grief comes from many forms.
The loss of someone that we love, (whether that is through death, divorce or broken down relationships)
The heart wrenching loss of our beloved fur babies.
Loss of stable relationships like a friend, teacher or colleague,
The loss of a job or our home or even one of our favourite items!
Maybe we feel the loss of our own identity and stability when we hit significant changes through our lives. (menopause, teenager into adulthood and the loss of childhood freedom, empty nesting )
On retirement and feeling a loss of purpose
Through ageing or disability and losing their ability to do what was “normal “from that they used to do, and are struggling to know how to adjust
Or maybe moving home and needing to re-establlsh your place in the community
All these things can be daunting and deserve a period of grieving.
We experience grief all very differently and we handle it differently.
There is no one way or even right way.
Being able to recognise your emotions and experience your grief is an important part for your healing,
To be able feel the sensations and let them express themselves so they can be released.
We want to experience the grief but not stay there, attach to it, or be identified through it.
Emotion is energy in motion and will come in waves of intensity until it fades, and not to be held onto or become our identity.
There are things to be learnt from grief.
Reflective practices / journaling / meditation
Can you think of anything that may have been insightful for you through your grief?
Do you have more compassion to others when you recognise their grief?
Are you able to find new levels of empathy or resilience?
How have you grown or evolved from your experiences?
Try a grounding Yoga practice to bring you back to your body.
Maybe grief is raw for you right now and feels like you can’t climb out of the deep pit you feel yourself in,
How do you give compassion to yourself?
Or, what tiny step could you take in this one moment to shift the intensity of it?
Maybe, just wrapping your arms around yourself, or stroking your own arm, hair or cheeks.
A small kind step of compassion to soothe you could be that first step and then noticing, even for one moment, was there a release? And if yes, maybe stay there or do it again each time you feel overwhelmed by grief.
Find someone to talk to who is a good listener, maybe a professional, or group that is specific to your grief.
Being sure to surround yourself with people that are supportive and stay away from those situations where you pulled down further if it is not right for you, you will know.
Finding some thing, even in the hard times, to be grateful for
maybe you are grateful to have loved so hard, or had that job but now an opportunity to find a new one that is even more aligned to you, or you are recently or long retired and now have more time for your family or chance to try new hobbies, or become a mentor for someone who would to listen to your wisdoms.
What ever your situation now, or what it once was, know that nothing lasts, nothing stays the same and we can be sure of that!
Keep looking with eyes and heart wide open for those glimmers of hope. Your grief will ease.
Be awake to the life lines, the new opportunities and experiences you can and will experience.
You can move through this, you CAN.
much love Sue xx
My FREE meditations that may be useful for you (on insight timer)
